An irregular, irreverent, post-modern account of the surreal, the ordinary, and the bizarre happenings on and around the Felia lavender farm in Crete

Sunday, September 24, 2006

4x4

A four legged three lettered animal
comes into our farm every day
and shits

A four legged three lettered animal
comes into our farm every day
and annoys our livestock

A four legged three lettered animal
comes into our farm every day
and digs among the crops

A four legged three lettered animal
comes into our farm every day
and breaks down the tender seedlings

That's four four legged three lettered animals
in all -
if not more

A two legged five lettered animal
encourages the entry
of these four legged three lettered animals
into our farm every day

A two legged five lettered animal
silently and smugly applauds the entry
of these four legged three lettered animals
into our farm every day

That's four four legged three lettered animals
and two two legged five lettered animals
in all
that are pissing me off
on a daily basis

The locals say:
poison
or
shoot them
and I shake my head and demur


For now!

2 comments:

  1. I think that it would be a mistake to shoot or poison the two-legged animals whilst there is a law forbidding manslaughter where you reside, and I am not sure that you would escape the strictures of the law even if you constrained yourself to removing only the four-legged animals this way.

    There is another way, however. Get yourself an Aquila Chrysaetos, or Golden Eagle. These can be trained readily to fly from the fist, and a large female will readily dispose of your neighbours' moggies when they trespass. What's more, the law can't touch you for it - as long as you don't shout, "Kill the f***ing cat" when you launch the bird!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Thats if the four legged three letter animal is a cat.
    Would the two legged five letter eagle deal with a four legged three letter dog in the same way?

    Or maybe you could just go and shit on the land of the two two legged animals dwelling?

    And dig among the two two legged animals flower bed

    In seriousness, this is a crap thing that is happening. I would like to know if and how you resolve it.

    ReplyDelete